The Ultimate Test...(s)

So...my strength has been measured. My will power has been sized up. There I stood between the beginning and end of my journey. Right in the middle of the tough road and the easy way. There the path of health was staring me in my face as I reached for the finger tip of doom!! I started the Holiday weekend without a care in my body. No, I wasn't worried that it would drag me into the dark side. I didn't even begin to think that the Labor Day Frenzy would have any effect on my stature whatsoever. I was only thinking about the 3 day weekend. What?! What?! And thank you, God, for the 3 days because they were marvelous no matter how daunting and troubling they seemed to become near the end.

Things I did this weekend that I am not proud of:
1.) I made my baby really mad at me
2.) I asked someone to smoke one of their cigarettes
3.) I almost ate a piece of chicken and shrimp

So, number 1 may seem a little random and number 3 even randomer (yes I can say this word because it's my blog), but just hear me out. I'm starting a new thing. A new vegetarian thing except I eat fish because I need protein and it's delicious. This really doesn't seem like the best time to start this venture seeing as how I love meat. I love cheeseburgers, I love steak, and most of all I looove bacon!! And now that I'm giving up my beloved smoking turning down one of my other desires is a bit disastrous, but so far so good...kinda. At least I haven't strangled anybody yet. Still very hard to give up so many things you love at once.

1.) I can be a little bit of a jerk sometimes (no judging), and instead of apologizing when I am jerk-like I tend to continue to be a jerk and ask for forgiveness when I'm done. And maybe taking a walk down the neighborhood street doesn't seem like a jerkhole thing to do, but when you add a neighborhood that you don't know too well that's kinda ify and the fact that I'm 5'1" (but legally 5'2" because that's what my license says) the story changes a little bit. This just happens to be exactly what I did to infuriate my loved one because they were worried about me and had asked me not to go and blah blah and all that good stuff. But, during the time we had already been into it and I thought it best to do what I wanted to do because I wanted to. Simple as that. So, needless to say it didn't go well when I got back to the house.

2.) I got back to the house after being accosted by some crazy person on the street aka my baby and it didn't really sit well with my aggravated mode. Then like a Devil-sent miracle a man appeared on my porch and what did he have in his hand but a lovely, steaming, gold mind!! A Pall Mall menthol!! Yes, please! It was like the angels felt my struggle and knew exactly what I needed at the time. And, as I reached out to accept the gift a thought crossed my mind. My baby had gone into the house and I was outside about to indulge in life's greatest pleasure when something told me to go inside. Something said not to take a cigarette from this generous man (who was actually my friend and not a stranger because that would have been weird). And you know what?...I listened. I don't know why I listened, but I did, and I went inside...Saved by the voice.

3.) Somebody throw me a fried chicken wing. It has to be fried!! Tell me why I decide to go veggie when all of the great eating holidays are coming up. Labor Day kicks it off with the cookouts, man. Then Thanksgiving, then Christmas, then New Years, and oh the horror of not engulfing all of my yum yums!! It makes me sick just to think about not enjoying all of the wonderful foods. To start off my Holidays of Veggieness one of my friends had a "Fry Day." No, not your typical Bar-B-Que on Labor Day, but still a cool way to celebrate right?...WRONG!! I could enjoy all of the fried twinkies, and fried oreos, and fried broccoli I wanted, but what about the chicken??!! What about the shrimp??!! Please just one morsel. Just one little smidgen of crust from the crustaceans, please!!! All, that I could think about while I ate the fried pickles and the french fries. Can you imagine not being allowed to eat something you crave so much not because you're allergic and it might kill you or because you're fasting, so you don't get smitten. No, just because you made a promise to yourself and your babycakes that you wouldn't. "For our own health and cleansing purposes!"...oh yeah.

I'd just like to say thank you for the support. My friends and family keep me going in this journey of self-love and self-improvement. They really believe in me and make me believe in myself. I thank all of them wholeheartedly for that. It means so much to me, and it would mean so much more if one of them would bring me a junior bacon cheeseburger from Wendy's tonight around 11:30. I'll stay up!...I'll give you 5 bucks...6 bucks if it comes with a frosty.